08 November 2005

Subtle knocking

Opportunity never knocks on my door. It generally kicks down the door with four or five friends and bashes me in the head until I make a decision. Go or stay? Near or far? More money or more freedom? Gives me quite a headache at times. I recognize that I am blessed by having an abundance of choices, but isn't it easier when there is an obvious answer?

Just as K and I have set our sights to leaving, some possibilities for staying arise. If we stay, I could probably keep some of the financial security of my current job on a part-time basis, should be able to find a full-time job heading the new direction, and might be able to start school 8 months earlier since the programs here start in January instead of August. But, we would still be "here" in a general sense (because we'd still have to move), which feels like a let-down at this point. "Here" is also not where I want to stay for the rest of my life, but places have a way of sucking you in when you're not looking.

Based on a process he put into motion a year and a half ago, K is suddenly getting invited to apply for good jobs in this area. 3! In less than two weeks! No guarantee on getting hired, or even interviewed, but these are the kinds of opportunities he's been striving to get for the last seven years. If we move away, he will definitely have to wait at least six months and probably longer to get into hiring pools at the new place, and then hope to get hired sooner or later. There's a chance he might never hired as a FF again, but that might not be a bad thing.

And, how can I resist the lure of the hiring officer in Oregon who was excited to talk to us? She really made my whole weekend when I spoke with her Friday, and K on Saturday. We were both left wondering why we hadn't jumped on a plane immediately and signed up. Yes, that is her job. But that is also the job of several other people we've talked to, and I've never hung up the phone feeling this way. Any suggestions?

Off topic: I've heard that you're unable to dream in a foreign language until you've reached a comfortable fluency level where your brain can think through the language even on auto-pilot. What does it say if I'm dreaming about helping and rescuing everyone? All night, every night? And I sometimes wake up panicked because there must be people out there, right now, who need my help and I'm just laying around in bed?

1 comment:

Pregnant In Texas said...

It might mean that you need more sleep. Roll over, hug K, and enjoy your morning.